escape.

its time escape from this place. why is it the i can never be happy with myself and my life?. is this all pay back for my idiocy years not to long ago?. if it is, then yes i deserve this bullshit of a life. if it isnt punishment then why?. why do i have to wake up every morning wishing i hadnt?. wishing i could have expired during my peaceful sleep. if only i could escape it all. escape this body, this mind, this world, this life. its to much to take. i dont want to deal with it anymore. i cant help but despise of those who appear to have it easy. who can listen and comprehend everything they hear. why cant i have that?. why do I have such a hard time learning?. theres something wrong with me. i dont know what it is. take this life from me and you’ll be loved by my spirits forever. i couldnt ask for anything more, just take it. im offering it to you, take it. whats the use. why would you want a life that someones taken advantage of?. theyve ruined all potential trust. theyve backstabbed. theyve lied numerous lies of serious matters. they cant focus for enough time to accomplish anything. they constantly ‘talk the talk’. why would you want this?. you dont and thats why you havent taken the offer. i understand now. when you take advantage of something, something as precious as life and its contents. you deserve nothing more then to be treated inadequately. all actions have an outcome. all greediness replies. dont be selfish and absurd like i was. and possibly still am. be yourself. nothing less and nothing more. make yourself proud, take pride in what you do. put those dreams it to actions. never give up. always remember how many people actually do care about you. and love having you around. do it, and ask no questions. should i take my own advice? probably, but its as if its to late.